A time for reflection.
May 10th, 2008
Over the last couple of days, I looked at where I was in my life. Overall I’m happy with every aspect except for one, my job. This isn’t me ranting to the highest of heavens about how terrible my job is, to tell you the truth, I have a good job. I work with people I like, the work isn’t challenging and the money is, well, all right. There isn’t much to complain about, except…
I’ve been working for Old Navy for the last 9 years, almost ten this August, I know too long but the benefits are amazing and if you could handle going to the same store day after day for 9 years you would do it too. I staved off becoming a supervisor for as long as I could. Then the pressure began. I kept feeling the “move up or move out” mentality and so I finally succumbed and decided that I would take on the position.
Well, that’s only partly true. I was asked to be a temporary supervisor for a few months, and then ultimately our newest General Manager, who has since left after five months, decided that I no longer should be temporary, but permanent. It was a good move, but I stopped striving to enter management a long time ago since our store went through general managers like…I can’t think of a simile, but you catch my drift, right? I just got tired of proving myself every single time a new GM was hired. Over time, the idea of becoming a supervisor didn’t interest me and every time someone talked to me about becoming one I said I wasn’t interested and changed the subject.
Now I am a supervisor and yesterday was the beginning of my regret. Today, one of the managers asked if I was alright and if I wanted to talk. I said there wasn’t anything, and then he asked if I had bitten off more than I could chew. I responded, “About this job? No.” What’s really bothering me about my job is I feel like I’m sacrificing more than I want. I never say no to my bosses, ever. They always thank me for being flexible, but there’s a point when they unknowingly or knowingly take advantage of my flexibility.
The question is, “Is it all worth the benefits of being a supervisor?” Is having to work the occasional Sunday even though according to my faith I shouldn’t, worth it? Is having to cancel my weekly piano lesson to come into work, worth it? Is having to close the store at 9:30pm only to open it the next morning at 6am all week, worth it? Is having my schedule changed after I’ve already planned out my week, worth it? In my heart? No. But if my boss asks, yes.
